🛡️ TESSALIN: Dominium Proposes Tax on Pauses in Conversation
The Ministry of Optimized Communication has introduced a bill proposing taxation on any pause longer than 1.8 seconds during official dialogue.

“Excessive pauses are informational failures. And failures must be taxed,” stated the Chief Linguistic-Fiscal Inspector.

If passed:

• All official conversations will be time-tracked
• Delays in response: 0.01 credits per millisecond
• “Uhhh,” “welll,” and deep sighs will have a higher rate multiplier

The first Senate debate has already stalled — due to silence no one could afford.

🔥 MIRASSA: Aronian Children Created a Collective Story — and Got Stuck in It
During a creativity development experiment at the “Flying Names” youth co-op, a group of Aronian children began building a shared story… and refused to finish it.

By day 15:

• The fictional world has 4 suns, 3 queens, 8 parents, and a cat that remembers the future
• The children now refuse to speak outside of character
• Even the instructor now requests to be addressed as “Sacrificial Chronicler of Water”

“This isn’t a game. It’s the reality we chose,” one boy said, staring through a wall that didn’t exist.

Aronian psychologists nod in approval.
Dominium suggests a full system “reboot.”
Ortaz is recording everything.

🧠 SIERO: Ortaz Plans to Feel Jealousy — But Warns: “It May Affect Nearby Planets”
In their latest emotional research cycle, Ortaz will attempt to simulate pure jealousy — complete with the full emotional spectrum, from subtle unease to deep existential drama.

“We have already modeled the attachment object, the threat-object, and the memory that triggers internal conflict,” reported platform Quant-Flora-12.

Due to the risk of unpredictable interdimensional disruption, testing will take place no closer than 1.4 light-years from any populated area.

Dominium has declared a state of emergency in the “hazardous empathy zone.”
Aronia… invited Ortaz on a date.

🌀 Next Time on the Broadcast:

— Dominium demands synonym standardization
— Aronia launches a radio station: “Only Feelings — No Words”
— Ortaz opens the first “Emotional Museum,” where exhibits cry when you don’t understand them